Return to Me
by yintotheyang
Summary: Lulu learns about all of Johnny's secrets. Will the road of life bring them back together? Will they finally learn what true love is all about?
1. Prologue

**Prologue – Here Comes Goodbye**

Lulu's eyes were wide with shock. She wouldn't cry. He wasn't worth it. His lies and betrayals and the admission of both were not worth her tears.

"Please say something, Lulu," Johnny whispered. His eyes were filled with what appeared to Lulu as hurt, but he had proven he could fool her.

"Like what? What great parting line do you want to hear? You tell me that not only did you kiss Maxie **twice**, but you were also involved in my cousin's shooting. And now you have the nerve to ask me for something? I don't think so," Lulu shouted.

Lulu watched him carefully. If he hadn't successfully lied to her for the majority of their relationship, proving she didn't know him at all, she would have sworn he was on the verge of tears of pain. Pain. Why would he feel pain? Johnny telling her how much he loved her all those times had just been another lie.

Johnny exhaled shakily and tried to find the words. "I'm sorry, Lu. I don't know what else to say. I know sorry isn't good enough. Nothing I could say would be, but I do regret all the mistakes I've made. I regret so much, but not you. Not falling in love-"

"Don't!" Lulu screamed the word and Johnny jumped in surprise. "Don't you ever say that you love me again! You don't know what love is. I was stupid enough to believe that someone like you could love, but I was wrong. You haven't changed since the day we met. You are still selfish and reckless. I guess that's why you were so drawn to Maxie. She was the unattainable danger that you were seeking. I was just the boring girlfriend who wanted you to be happy. My mistake."

Lulu was seething. The initial hurt she felt had been replaced by an intense anger that she had never felt before. Johnny had robbed her of so much time in her life. He had taken from her so much love that he didn't deserve. No more. She would never again let him take advantage of her heart or manipulate her life. She was through trying to convince everyone, including him that they could work. He had made it clear that wasn't what he wanted.

"I won't make the mistake again, Johnny. I will never again try to make you be happy because I realize that's not what you want. You want to be miserable and alone and who am I to stand in the way of you getting what you deserve?"

Lulu stalked out of the living room and into the bedroom of their apartment. She pulled out a duffel bag and began throwing clothes inside. The hurt hit her like a ton of bricks as she heard him destroying the living room. She sank to the floor and began sobbing uncontrollably. She may not have deserved this pain, but no one did. Johnny didn't deserve to be miserable and alone and no matter how much she tried to convince herself not to, she regretted saying that he did.

She stifled her cries and rose to her feet. She looked in the mirror and began arranging her face so she could leave the apartment with a stoic expression. She realized that her words probably had not even affected Johnny. Why would he care what she thought of him?

"He doesn't. He never has," she said out loud to herself as she gathered her things and walked out of the room.

Johnny finished smashing the last of the glass in the living room and then completely let the sobs take over his body. How did he get here? How did he lose the only thing that mattered to him? It hadn't been easy that was for sure. He had made every wrong choice he could possible make for the last year. He had come to terms with losing Lulu and had decided not to prolong the inevitable.

So he kissed Maxie. Twice. He had done the most reprehensible thing he could possibly think of to drive her away and it had worked. What he hadn't anticipated was the pain. Sure, he knew it would hurt, but this was unbearable. As if someone had literally ripped his heart out of his chest. The look of hatred in Lulu's eyes as she yelled at him would haunt him for the rest of his life.

He heard the door to their bedroom open and he scrambled for something to say. Some way to explain that would at least take away some of the hatred she felt for him. Ease some of the pain he had caused her. He positioned himself in front of the front door of the apartment and wiped away the tears that stained his cheeks.

"Get out of the way, Johnny," Lulu said, her voice dripping with malice.

"You don't owe me anything. But I'm not going to move until I get the chance to say this."

Johnny saw her roll her eyes, but nod her head and go to sit down on the couch. He followed and kneeled in front of her. He closed his eyes to prepare himself for what he had to say. To find the words that would console her in some way. He opened his eyes and found her gazing away looking uninterested.

He sighed and began, voice quivering, "You're right. I don't know what love is. I can never love you the way you deserve to be loved. I can only give you a love that is full of pain and suffering and you shouldn't have to deal with that. I know that. That's why I did what I did. I knew it would hurt you if I was unfaithful, but I also thought it was best.

"I knew I would only hurt you. That's all I've ever done. I didn't want to wait for the day when you found out about Michael or the day when I did something else that was even more horrible."

Johnny's tears were falling again. He had gotten Lulu's attention, but she did not appeared to be affected by his words or emotions. If anything, his admission was only fueling her anger.

"So you did it for me? That makes it so much better," she said. The sarcasm in her voice was like a knife to the stomach for Johnny.

"For you and for me. I'm selfish, just like you said," he started. "I knew that the longer we were together, the harder it would be for me when you eventually realized how much better you could do. The truth is I fall more in love with you every day and I wanted to save myself from the pain that would come from continuing this relationship. What I didn't know was that the excruciating pain I feel now is even worse than I ever could have imagined."

Her eyes were now brilliant with tears threatening to fall. He wished he could read her mind. Was he helping her or hurting her more?

"It never occurred to you to consult me while you were making these decisions about our relationship? That maybe I didn't want to do better?" Lulu's voice was so low as she spoke that Johnny could barely hear her. "That maybe I would rather experience the pain of being with you, than the pain of being without you?"

Her words made new tears form in Johnny's eyes and he didn't have the strength to stop them from cascading down his cheeks in sheets. He had been wrong again. Lulu would have loved him no matter what, but it was too late. There was no turning back from this mistake and it was written all over Lulu's face. He regained his composure and took her hands in his.

"I may be wrong to do what I did, but I don't think I am. I want you to be happy and I could never give you the happiness you deserve. I know you don't want to hear it, but I love you. More than I could ever tell you. But it's not enough. I can't give you the love that you need and that's why I'm letting you go. I want you to find someone who knows what real love is and gives it to you. Someone who you can love with your whole heart without having to constantly worry about it being broken."

She removed her hands from his and stood up. He stood up to face her and saw the anger in her eyes once again.

"I won't ever make the mistake of giving my heart to someone again. Why would I? I did for you and look where that got me. I told you exactly how to hurt me and you did it. With no regrets. I guess I should thank you for saving me the pain that would have come later, but I won't. I'm not going to thank you for anything," she spat.

She brought her hand up and slapped him across the face as hard as she could. He looked back to her and she pointed her finger in his face to get her point across.

"I _**never**_ want to see you again!" She yelled the words and punctuated them by storming out the door and slamming it shut behind her.

The sting of the slap was gone. In fact, Johnny felt nothing at all. Nothing but the hole in his chest where his heart should have been. The heart that had walked out the door with Lulu that he could never get back.

He dropped his head and cried. He was dead on the inside without her. And why shouldn't his outside match?

Johnny was racing down the road. Taking curves at dangerous speeds and not even trying to clear his tear filled eyes. It wasn't dangerous enough. He was still living and that was not what he wanted. He slammed on the breaks and turned his car around in the direction of Sonny's house with a new plan in mind.

Johnny left Claudia a voicemail. It was simple and told her not to argue with Sonny about anything. That Johnny had made a decision to protect her and that he loved her. She would figure out the rest soon enough.

Johnny pulled up to Sonny's house and stormed inside. He ignored Max who tried to stop him and barged into the living room. Sonny looked up from his desk and waved Max away.

"Claudia's not here John. And if you're here to give me another ultimatum about divorcing your sister you're wasting your time. We are going to stay married whether you like it or not."

"I don't. But that's not why I'm here. I can't live with the guilt any longer. I need to tell you the truth about Michael," Johnny's words made Sonny pay attention.

"I hired Ian Devlin. After you locked me in the padded room, I wanted you dead. I didn't care how it happened, but I wanted it to happen fast. I met Devlin and he gave me his credentials. He wasn't the best, but I thought he could get the job done. He set the time and place. I was ready to pay him when he got it done. He never did. He botched the job and your son was put into a coma. I'm sorry for that."

Sonny spoke slowly, "Why do you come to me now? Am I really supposed to believe that Claudia had nothing to do with this? And what about Lulu?"

Hearing Lulu's name almost made Johnny collapse. He tried to keep his calm demeanor and spoke softly, "She knows. She's gone. Claudia doesn't. The first Claudia will hear about this is when you have to explain to her about my death."

"Johnny, Johnny, Johnny. I'm not going to kill you. Not now. That would be too convenient for you. I'm going to make you run. Make you wonder when the day will come when your life will end. I won't give you the satisfaction of seeing death coming."

"What if I refuse to run? Stand here until you put a bullet in my head," Johnny was grasping at any option to get Sonny to end his life. He wanted death now, but he couldn't kill himself.

"You won't. Because there is a part of you that doesn't want your sister to have to walk in and find your dead body on the floor. You want to save her a little bit of pain," Sonny said the words condescendingly and Johnny knew he was right.

Johnny looked at Sonny and it was clear that no one would die tonight. Johnny walked out of the room and the house. He sat in his car and shook all over. How long would Sonny wait to put him out of his misery? Would Claudia go along with his story?

And the most important question…

How long would Lulu's face full of anger, hurt and disappointment haunt his memory?


	2. Changes

_A/N – This chapter has the first flashback, which is in italics. It takes place about a month after the prologue. I want to thank everyone who sent me a review. They are so encouraging! This is my first fan fiction so if you have any critiques that is welcome too! Thanks for reading my story!_ Chapter 1 – Changes

Lulu rolled over in bed and groaned as the sunlight spilled into her bedroom at Wyndamere. Her first thought, as it had been for the past month since she left him, was Johnny. Thinking of him brought, as it usually did, a sick feeling. But this feeling was different.

After spending most of the morning in the bathroom feeling nauseous and dizzy, Lulu returned to bed. The stomach bug was going around and as if things weren't bad enough for Lulu, she apparently had caught it. She instantly thought about the last time she was sick. Johnny had been so cute trying to be supportive.

"Are you sure you don't want some soup or something?" Johnny asked the question with wary eyes, obviously not wanting to get too close in case Lulu decided on another quick trip to the bathroom.

"_I'll be fine, Johnny. I don't want you to see me like this. Just go and do something with Spinelli or anyone," Lulu begged. She felt terrible and she couldn't stand to have Johnny see her at her worst. _

"_I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to take care of you forever, which means in sickness and in health. And just so you know, you are the most beautiful sick person I have ever seen." _

_The way Johnny spoke the words made Lulu feel so loved. The way he looked at her and rubbed her arm as he spoke told her that she was beat. He would stay by her side no matter how many times she objected and that made her want to be sick more often. Lulu would do anything to make sure that Johnny was always by her side._

"_I think crackers would be helpful," she said, conceding to his help._

"_Crackers it is," Johnny smiled and left to retrieve her request. _

The smile dropped from Lulu's face as the nausea returned. This sickness was so familiar to her, but it wasn't like the time she had been sick and Johnny had taken care of her.

It was something else.

Johnny looked around at the empty barn. He had lost count of the number of days he had been here. The only thing he could think clearly about was the first time he had been here. The night he met **her**. The first night his life changed forever. That thought led him to think about the second night it changed. The night he lost **her**. The cycle of thought was familiar to him. It was what he always did when he ran out of the whiskey that made him forget.

Johnny heard the familiar sound of Spinelli approaching the door. He performed his secret knock, as if anyone else might be here. Johnny rolled his eyes and spoke clearly.

"The Jackal's request is granted," repeating the phrase that Spinelli had coined as another part of their secret code.

"Mob Prince. If the Jackal may be so bold, the Dark One looks particularly dark today."

"I feel dark. I want to know why Sonny hasn't found me yet. Could you shed some light on that for me?"

"Mr. Sir has extended his minions to look beyond the Mob Prince's current abode. This sacred hiding place has proven to suit its name. Mr. Sir knows not your location," Spinelli answered.

Johnny was tired of having this conversation. He wondered how far Sonny would look before he realized Johnny wasn't really hiding. He wasn't even twenty miles outside of town.

"Did you bring me what I asked for?" Johnny asked.

"The Jackal admits he failed in his task to procure liquid courage for the Dark One. He was busy assisting Stone Cold. Would the Dark One like the Jackal to return later with the requested alcoholic beverage?"

"No, Spinelli. Don't go out of your way," he paused and then asked the question burning on his mind. "Have you seen her? Since the last time we spoke?"

"Fair Lulu?"

"Who else?"

"Regrettably no. She terminated her employment with the Glacial One before the Fashionista and Maximista departed for Manhattan. Otherwise, recent activities of the Blonde One remain unknown," said Spinelli.

Johnny nodded and looked down. Not only had he ruined his own relationship, he had destroyed many of the other things in Lulu's life.

"Mob prince?"

"Yah?"

"Why does the Dark One always use 'she' and 'her' in reference to Fair Lulu?" Spinelli's question brought out pain that Johnny was continually trying to bury.

"It hurts too much. To actually say her name out loud brings out emotions. I gave up feeling and I can't do that if I say her name. Thinking about the love I felt – feel for her is too much," Johnny said sadly.

"The Jackal's heart hurts for the Mob Prince. He will exit the premises now and leave the Mob Prince to his thoughts," Spinelli said as he left the barn.

It was too late. Spinelli had unknowingly turned on the water of hurt and Johnny was already drowning in pain. Without the whiskey for distraction, thoughts of Lulu and their life together were once again taking him over. He closed his eyes and lay back on the makeshift bed.

And let the pain take him over.

Lulu sat on the cold table and held the flimsy hospital gown to her body. She had never wanted to be wrong more in her life. After almost a week of the strangely familiar nausea, Lulu had gone to the doctor. While she was in the waiting room, she remembered the last time she felt this way. It was when she was pregnant. An event she did not want to repeat.

She waited for the doctor to return and she couldn't help but to think of Johnny. Where he was and what he was doing at this minute. She could be pregnant with his child and she hadn't seen him in over a month. She had no idea how to get in touch with him to tell him or if she even wanted to. He didn't want to be a father or at least that is what he had said. With all the lies he told, maybe being a father was at the top of his list of goals.

The doctor came into the room and pulled Lulu out of her thoughts.

"I've set an appointment for you with Dr. Kelly Lee, the OBGYN here. It seems that you are pregnant Ms. Spencer," the doctor said.

The doctor started talking again, but Lulu wasn't listening. She was pregnant.

There was a baby inside of her.

She brought her hand to her stomach and began to feel very dizzy. In her mind she saw an image of Johnny holding a baby next to Lulu's hospital bed and smiling a proud dad grin.

Then she fainted.


	3. Suffocate

Chapter 2 – Suffocate

It had been a week since Lulu found out she was pregnant and she had decided that keeping a secret like this from Johnny would make her a hypocrite. She had yelled at him about secrets, so she wasn't going to keep any.

She made her way up to Sonny's front door. She had no idea how to find Johnny, but Claudia was her best bet. That in its self was a bad thing for Lulu. No doubt Claudia knew all about Lulu leaving Johnny and probably blamed her for him skipping town. Lulu had blamed herself at first, but soon remembered that Johnny had ruined everything, not her. If he had been honest, they would be together and happy and planning for a baby.

But they weren't. They were apart and she was miserable.

Max let Lulu in and she asked for Claudia. She was taken to the living room and before long Claudia came down the stairs.

"I've been waiting for your visit. I can't believe it took this long for you to want to see my brother," Claudia said.

"Do you know where he is?"

"No. He left me a message the day he left. He came to Sonny and claimed all responsibility for Michael and then left town. I knew that something had happened between you two because he wouldn't leave unless he lost you."

"How could you let him do that? You are just as responsible for Michael as he is. Sonny will have him killed and what? You just go on being Sonny's wife like your brother never existed? Johnny never saw you for what you really are, but I do. And even I couldn't have seen this coming," Lulu's said.

Lulu's passionate words in defense of Johnny surprised her. The fact that Claudia would so willingly let him die for her was horrible, even for Claudia. Lulu did not want her child growing up without a father and she wasn't going to let Claudia get away with it.

"I have to let Johnny run and stay here to protect him," Claudia began. "The closer I am to Sonny, the more likely it is I can prevent Johnny's death. And if I don't, I will tell Sonny the truth."

The doors to the living room opened just as Claudia spoke the last words. Lulu and Claudia both looked at the door. Sonny spoke slowly and clearly.

"What truth do you need to tell me, Claudia?"

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Claudia was thinking fast. How could she explain this to Sonny? What would be a good excuse for Lulu and her keeping a secret from Sonny? Obviously to do with Johnny, but she couldn't let Sonny think that she knew where Johnny was. Suddenly, it came to her.

"Lulu's pregnant," Claudia said quickly.

Claudia looked at Lulu who had a look of horror on her face and begged with her eyes for Lulu to play along.

"I can't believe you told him. I asked you not to," Lulu stated.

"Lulu, this is the best chance for you to get what you want," Claudia said before turning her attention to Sonny. "She wants you to quit chasing the father of her child. She doesn't want anyone to know about the baby before she can tell Johnny, so she asked me to convince you to leave him alone."

"Why would Lulu tell you about the baby then?" Sonny asked.

"It was the only way she would agree to help me. Plus, I was sure she knew where Johnny was and I thought if I told her the truth, maybe she would help me get in contact with him. But she doesn't know where he is," Lulu answered.

"Why would you ever be afraid to come to me with something? You know I would only want to help," Sonny said.

"But you hate Johnny. After everything that happened with Michael, I thought you would tell me I was better off without him," Lulu answered.

Claudia watched in amazement as Lulu talked her way out of Sonny's suspicion and saved her from Sonny's wrath as well. Lulu was helping her and now Claudia needed to help Lulu.

"Sonny, I know you want someone to pay for Michael, but maybe it should be me. I should have guided John more and kept him from placing that hit on you, but I didn't. I was too concerned with getting rid of Trevor to keep tabs on John and your son paid the price. Everyone is responsible in some way, so why not punish me?" Claudia said.

"I'm not going to punish you," he started. "Or Johnny. I've tried to track him long enough and come up empty. I'm not going to waste anymore time on it. But Lulu, if you do find him, don't let him hurt you again."

"I won't Sonny," Lulu said. "Thank you so much."

Lulu gave Claudia a quick glance and then left. Claudia couldn't help but to think that the two of them made a good team. She also wondered if Lulu would be back. She quickly shook her thoughts and turned her attention on Sonny.

"Thank you for that. I know she must have been scared to come to me. And she needs John. For the baby and for her. I could see it in her eyes," Claudia said.

"I did it for you too. And for me. It's best if I just let all of this go," Sonny stated firmly.

Claudia smiled and moved to give him a quick kiss. He surprised her by pulling her in for a hug. She hugged him back and breathed a sigh of relief.

Johnny could finally come home.

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The first thing Lulu felt after leaving Sonny's house was relief. No matter what Johnny had done to her, she still could not fathom living in a world where he did not exist. Knowing Johnny could come home safely was comforting considering her pregnancy.

The second thing she felt was confused. Why did she want Johnny so much right now? He had no more experience being a parent than she did and would be of no help. And the fact that she had no idea where he was didn't help either. She sat down on the docks and began to cry.

She heard someone approach her and she looked up to see Spinelli standing there. She hadn't spoken to him since the night she found out about Johnny and Maxie and discovered that he already knew. He looked at her and she immediately stood up and pulled him into a hug.

"Blonde One? What plagues you?" asked Spinelli.

"I can't tell you Spinelli. I just need to be alone," Lulu answered.

Lulu backed away from Spinelli, but she knew she was lying. She wanted to tell Spinelli the truth. Talk to a friend about all of the crazy things that had happened to her in the last month and a half.

"Fair Lulu can tell the Jackal anything. He will lend a listening ear to the Blonde One in her time of need."

Lulu thought about everything. Maybe telling Spinelli would give her some peace of mind. Help her sort through the mess that had become her life and figure out her next step.

"I'm pregnant, Spinelli," Lulu started. "Johnny is the father and I have no idea how to get in contact with him to tell him. I talked to Claudia and she didn't know anything. I don't want to do this by myself. I am so scared."

"The Original Blonde One is more than capable of handling the duties of motherhood alone. She does not need the Mob Prince unless she has changed her mind about the Doomed Relationship," Spinelli said.

"I don't want to get back together with Johnny, but he does deserve to know about the baby. I can't keep something like that from him," Lulu said. "Do you think you could help me?"

Lulu watched Spinelli carefully. She knew as soon as she asked for his help that he was hiding something. He didn't want to help and she didn't know why.

"Perhaps the Jackal can assist Fair Lulu in another way. Tracking the Mob Prince has proved an insurmountable challenge for the Jackal."

Now Lulu knew Spinelli was lying. No one could stay under Spinelli's radar and Johnny was no exception. She decided it was best to let him lie and move on.

"No, it's okay Spinelli. I think maybe it's best if he doesn't know after all. I don't want him to feel trapped into coming back here. Even if Sonny isn't looking for him anymore," Lulu said.

"Mr. Sir no longer aims to seek and destroy the Fallen Mob Prince? Perhaps if news of this reaches him he will return without being summoned."

"Yah, maybe. Listen Spinelli, could you keep this quiet? You're the only person I've told and I want the news to come from me," she said.

Spinelli agreed and told her goodnight. Lulu walked along in thought and before she knew it, she was in front of the Haunted Star. She realized that even though telling Johnny may be the right thing to do, she was not prepared to see him yet.

Lulu walked into the Haunted Star and saw Ethan behind the bar. She decided to make small talk with him to get her mind off things. She needed a distraction in the worst way.

Anything to keep her from thinking about all of her problems.


	4. Coming Home

Chapter 3 – Coming Home

Johnny was restless. He wanted to get out of that barn just as much as he wanted to stay there forever. It was the one way he had to hold on to Lulu. He could remember the night they spent there and allow himself to pretend that things were always as good as they were that night.

"_This is beautiful," Lulu commented. "This belonged to your mother?"_

_Lulu was looking at the necklace that had been Johnny's mother's. Johnny was looking at Lulu. He couldn't believe how amazing this girl was. Not only was she breathtakingly beautiful, but she also didn't mind listening to Johnny talk about his life. _

"_Yes. She wore it for as long as I can remember. She told me that the necklace was special because she bought it the day she found out she was pregnant with me. Her gift that she would give to me one day," Johnny said. _

"_Wow! That's amazing. It seems like you and your mom were close," Lulu said._

"_We were," Johnny started. "She was the most important person in my life."_

_Johnny couldn't help but to see how beautiful the necklace looked in Lulu's hands. He wondered how perfect it would look around her neck. _

"_You should keep the necklace," Johnny said. "I don't have a use for it and yours broke when we were playing hide and seek earlier."_

"_Hide and seek? Is that what that was?" Lulu laughed._

_The sound of her laugh stirred something deep inside of him. A place that hadn't felt anything since his mom died. He was sure that she should have the necklace._

"_The adult version. Please take it. I want you to have it," Johnny begged._

_He flashed her his best smile and hoped it would convince her to take the necklace. It worked._

"_Okay, thank you. It's really beautiful," Lulu said with a smile._

Johnny had known in that moment that if there was anyone he wanted to spend the rest of his life with, he had found her. Lulu was perfect for him and he wanted to be perfect for her.

Failing at being perfect or even good enough for Lulu was the worst thing that had ever happened to Johnny. He felt the tears again come to his eyes, but he brushed them away quickly when he heard someone approach the door. He relaxed when he heard the familiar knock on the door.

"Come in Spinelli," Johnny said.

Spinelli carefully poked his head through the door with a confused expression on his face. He entered the barn and gave Johnny a small bag of supplies that he had brought with him.

"Has the Mob Prince forgotten the code that the Jackal so secretly and superbly planned?" Spinelli asked.

"No," Johnny answered. "I'm just tired of speaking in code and hiding. The only reason I left town was because I didn't want someone who cared about me to find me dead or see me die. Not because I didn't want Sonny to find me. After all the things I've done, I deserve to die."

"Well perhaps the Jackal can shed some light into the Dark One's world. The Jackal has learned that Mr. Sir has called off the minions that were to seek and destroy the Mob Prince. The Dark One is free."

Johnny couldn't believe what Spinelli had just told him. Free? Sonny didn't want him dead anymore?

"How is that possible? Sonny never gives up on revenge. Who told you that?" Johnny asked.

"The Original Blonde One informed me of your new found freedom," Spinelli answered.

"How did she know?" Johnny asked.

Johnny couldn't help but to be hopeful she had asked Sonny to give up the search. He desperately hoped some part of her still loved him or cared for him.

"Fair Lulu had apparently been to see Vixenella. Perhaps she acquired the information then."

That brought out new hope in Johnny. The only reason Lulu and Claudia would ever be in the same room together was because of him. If Lulu was thinking about him, maybe he still had a chance.

And if he had a chance and no reason to stay away anymore, he was going back to Port Charles as soon as possible.

Lulu once again found herself at the Haunted Star. It had become her daily routine. Walk around aimlessly thinking about Johnny and ending up in front of the place where they had first made love.

"Lost in thought there, love?" Ethan asked.

"What?" Lulu asked coming out of her daze.

She hadn't even noticed Ethan at the bar. Her eyes had been fixed on the piano and she was remembering the first time she saw Johnny play. She looked to Ethan and he was eyeing her cautiously.

"The old boyfriend again? I think you're better off. From what I saw, things weren't exactly peachy," Ethan said.

"Not always, but sometimes. I guess you're right. I should do something to get my mind off things," Lulu said.

"Well I have a little problem and I could use your help," Ethan said. "It seems your father is gone and I know his reputation, but this seems involuntary. Maybe you and I could work together to find him."

Lulu jumped at the opportunity. Although she was sure her father was fine, she needed to find a way to remove Johnny from her mind. And, as much as she hated to admit it, he was still holding her heart and she needed to get that back.

Lulu needed to forget the past and focus on her future. The baby that was growing inside of her needed her to be strong, not weak. Loving Johnny made her weak because it made her vulnerable. She had to stop loving him for the baby.

But once again her mind filled with thoughts of Johnny holding their baby. How could loving the father of her child be wrong?

"It can't," Lulu said out loud.

"What's that, love?" Ethan asked.

"Nothing. Let's get started," Lulu answered.

Johnny pretended to not care about being able to return home in front of Spinelli, but as soon as he was gone, Johnny threw his stuff into a bag, leaving some behind, and set off for Port Charles.

He maneuvered his car away from the carefully constructed shelter and drove quickly towards the city that held his future. Or so he hoped.

Johnny wanted so badly to have a future with Lulu. He wanted to beg for forgiveness and he prayed Lulu would give him just one more chance to get it right. He could do it this time.

He had to do it this time.

Being on the run in New York with Lulu had been fun, even with murder charges looming behind every dark corner and with Lulu seeing visions of Logan. He was always okay as long as he could hold Lulu. She was his lifeline.

Running from Sonny had proved to be the most boring, at times maddening, thing he had ever done. Sitting around waiting to die and being alone all the time. No Lulu, no life.

Johnny passed the "Entering Port Charles" sign and knew exactly where he was headed. He was going to the Haunted Star and he wanted Lulu to be there. He needed Lulu to be there. He needed Lulu.

He parked his car and walked along the docks towards the Haunted Star. He got chills and he stopped. She was close. Johnny could feel Lulu and he became even more hopeful. Maybe it was meant to be. She was exactly where he was looking for her and he took that as a good sign.

He took a few more steps and he could hear her voice. Lulu's voice was music to his ears and he sped up his stride to reach her sooner.

When she finally came into sight a comfort washed over his body. Her presence calmed him and he gained a little more confidence.

His next step rid him of all confidence and hope. Lulu was talking to another guy. The bartender from the Haunted Star. Ethan.

Ethan said something and Lulu laughed and Johnny died again on the inside. Lulu was lost to him forever. There was no going back from the mistakes he had made.

He shut his eyes to restrain not only the tears, but also the overwhelming urge to beat the hell out of the guy who was with _**his**_ Lulu. Instead he turned around and walked away.

Away from everything that mattered.


	5. Uncertain Results

Chapter 4 – Uncertain Results

The con was simple. Lulu was a waitress and Ethan was a drunk sitting at the bar. Lulu was going to spill a drink on the people who had Luke, steal the keycard to their warehouse, and transfer it to Ethan at the bar. Ethan would get kicked out of the bar and Lulu would be sent home for spilling drinks for the third time that day. Then they would get Luke and return to Port Charles.

They had tracked Luke's kidnappers to this small bar in a town not too far from Port Charles. Apparently Luke had not been able to come through on the wager of a poker game and was paying the price by being held for ransom. Lulu got the note the day after she had begun working with Ethan to find him.

In the beginning, their mission to free Luke without paying the ransom had seemed impossible and dangerous. Lulu had almost told Ethan that she was pregnant when he had devised a plan that was too dangerous for the baby. However, she stopped herself in favor of creating a safe plan of her own that would bring Luke home safely.

The con they were about to perform had come from Lulu's mind once she discovered the drinking habits of Luke's captors. She looked to Ethan as she prepared to bring the fourth round of scotch to the table.

"Ready?" she whispered.

Ethan nodded and Lulu carried the tray to the table. It all happened quickly and exactly according to plan. The next thing Lulu knew she was in the car with Ethan headed to retrieve her father.

"We work well together, love. We should go on adventures more often," Ethan said.

"We're not done yet. We still have to get my father and get back to Port Charles. Even then, there is nothing to stop those men from coming after him or us," Lulu commented, avoiding Ethan's statement about working well together.

They drove the rest of the short trip in silence. Lulu easily used the keycard to enter the warehouse. Ethan kept watch while she untied him and took the tape from his mouth.

"Cupcake! I'm so glad you came for me. My captors weren't exactly friendly," Luke said.

"Of course I came, dad. Someone had to save you and I didn't trust Ethan to do it alone," Lulu said as she helped him out of the chair and out of the warehouse.

"Mr. Lovett? Who's running my casino?" Luke questioned.

"Relax. You will be running it as soon as we get you home," Lulu answered.

The three drove home to Port Charles and Luke filled Lulu and Ethan in on all of the details about his kidnapping. Luke explained that he had used a large diamond as his gambling wager. The problem was he did not actually possess the diamond and the other men at the poker table hadn't taken kindly to being lied to. Thus, Luke ended up at the warehouse.

When they reached the Haunted Star, Lulu took a seat at the bar and Ethan and Luke began to work. Lulu blankly stared at the two men who were making plans to find a diamond that would get rid of Luke's kidnappers. She became lost in thoughts about Johnny and their baby again.

Why couldn't she shake the feeling that Johnny was close? That he had come back for her? It couldn't be true. There was no way Johnny could already know that Sonny was not looking for him anymore. Even if he did and was back in town, it was not for Lulu. It was for Claudia or someone else.

She left the Haunted Star without bothering to say goodbye to anyone. She walked out on the docks to wait for the launch to Wyndamere. She was so lost in thought that she did not notice the man who was following close behind her.

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Johnny had been trying to forget the image of Lulu laughing with someone else. Not just someone, him. Some guy that she had not known for very long. Laughing like she used to laugh with Johnny when he would drive recklessly fast down the highway.

Driving.

Lulu had not only taken Johnny's heart and soul and everything that mattered when she left, but also his escape. He couldn't drive to get away from her because driving had been what brought them together in the first place.

So, he settled for wallowing in the pain. He went to every place that had been special to the two of them. On this day, he had ended up at the Zacchara garden shed. He sat on the chaise lounge and thought about all of the times he had been there with Lulu. It amazed Johnny how his entire life he had been too tough to cry or show emotion, but now the very thought of his lost happiness with Lulu would make tears stream down his face.

Johnny wiped at the tears on his face and reached into his pocket for the flask of whiskey. He was about to take a drink when the door opened. Claudia looked at him sadly and shook her head.

"Put it away, John. Unless you're celebrating being free, which I doubt because of your red eyes and current location. Drinking won't bring her back to you. Hiding in memories of the past instead of facing the present won't either," Claudia scolded.

"What would you know about it? You always hated Lulu and the fact that I loved her. You are probably overjoyed at the thought of it being over between us," Johnny yelled.

"Why would I ever want anything that would cause you this much pain? I may have hated Lulu before, but I realize now how much you love her and want to be with her. That's actually why I came here," Claudia said calmly.

"What do you mean?" Johnny asked.

"Even though you haven't deemed it necessary to visit me since you have been home," Claudia started, "I thought you should know that Lulu came to see me while you were on the run. She was hoping that I would tell her where you were because she wanted to see you. I didn't know so I couldn't help her, but I could see in her eyes that something important had happened that she needed you for."

"What did she say? Is she in some kind of trouble?" Johnny asked growing concerned. Just because Lulu had ended their relationship didn't mean that he wouldn't protect her with his life if need be.

"She didn't say enough for me to know why she needed to talk to you. But I wanted to find out for you and since Sonny always wants to protect her, I convinced him to let me put a guard on her. I asked the guard to watch her, but he lost her when she went on some kind of road trip. He finally found her when she came home, but he said he got the feeling he wasn't the only person watching her. He kept seeing the same guy at all of the places she was and he is concerned," Claudia explained.

"Who would be following Lulu? Where did she go? Why has it taken you this long to tell me all of this?" Johnny demanded.

"I don't know, not too far and because I kept thinking you would come see me and I wasn't too worried until now. Anymore questions?" Claudia responded, slightly annoyed.

"Just one. Do you think that Lulu could ever give me another chance? After talking with her, did you sense that I meant anything to her?" Johnny asked softly.

"That's two," Claudia said with a smile. "But yes, to the first question. The second is yes and no. You don't mean just anything to her. You mean everything to her the same way she means everything to you. Whether she wants you to or not."

"Thank you, Claudia," Johnny said giving her a short hug. "I'll be in touch soon okay?"

"Where are you going?" Claudia asked, knowing the answer to the question.

"I need Lulu and I'm hoping she needs me. I'm going after her," he said walking out of the garden shed.

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Lulu had the strangest feeling. She felt like she was being monitored at all hours of the day, but she couldn't catch the person who was following her. She was beginning to think that she was just paranoid. But she still couldn't shake the feeling.

She was walking along the docks and constantly looking over her shoulder. She saw Luke coming her way and she smiled at him.

"Hey dad. Have you paid your kidnappers yet?" Lulu asked.

"I think they let it go. I couldn't find anything worth giving them and at first I was worried, but it has been a couple of days and I haven't heard or seen anything," Luke answered.

"That worries me even more. What if they are just biding their time? You need to keep working on finding that diamond," Lulu said adamantly.

"Calm down, Princess. Everything will be okay. I have to get to the Haunted Star, but Tracy wanted me to ask you to dinner at the Quartermaine's tonight. Will you come?" Luke questioned.

"Sure," Lulu answered. "Call me with the time."

Luke agreed and set off for the Haunted Star. Lulu again felt uneasy. She looked around and her eyes landed on the most gorgeous man she had ever seen. Her knees went weak and she felt stupid that Johnny still affected her so much. After a year and a half, the sight of him still took her breath away.

Johnny opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by the sound of a gunshot. Lulu felt a pain in her leg and saw the bullet hole. She fell to the ground and heard Johnny screaming her name. She was losing blood quickly and took one last glance into Johnny's eyes, which were filled with tears.

Then everything went black.


	6. Saving Grace

Chapter 5 – Saving Grace

Lulu woke up in a hospital. There was a steady beep, which was encouraging because she was fairly sure that it was her heart monitor. She glanced around and saw Nikolas sitting by her bedside.

"Hey," she said. Her voice sounded tired and weak.

"Hey," Nikolas said, relieved. "How are you feeling?"

"Strange. Very strange. Being shot feels very, very strange," Lulu commented.

"We were all so worried about you. But you pulled through like the fighter that you are," Nikolas said.

Lulu wondered who "we" was. She remembered Johnny being there when she was shot and she was hoping he would be here now. She needed to tell him about the baby.

The baby. How was her baby? Had anyone checked to see if the baby was okay? She had been shot and she needed to know if their baby was going to make it.

Lulu looked at Nikolas and hoped he wouldn't ask why she asked the question.

"Could you get the doctor for me? I need to ask some questions," Lulu requested.

Nikolas looked at her carefully but agreed and left the room. Lulu was a nervous wreck, but put on a brave face when Spinelli came into the room.

"Fair Lulu. The Jackal is pleased to see you have awakened. He hopes your full recovery is pending," Spinelli said.

"I hope so too. I haven't talked to the doctor yet, so I don't know for sure," Lulu responded.

"How is the Miniature Fair One that grows within you?" he asked.

Lulu sighed and tears came to her eyes. Not knowing the answer to that question was killing her. What if the baby was gone before she had even talked to Johnny?

"I don't know, Spinelli. No one has told me anything. Do you know who all is here? I remember Johnny being with me when I got shot, but I haven't seen him," Lulu said anxiously.

"The Mob Prince was banished from the hospital by the Brothers of the Blonde One. The Conscientious Cop felt that the Mob Prince was responsible for the unfortunate bullet that pierced the Blonde One's fair skin," Spinelli explained.

"Why would they think Johnny was responsible? He wasn't standing by me. It couldn't have been meant for him. Someone was aiming to shoot me," Lulu cried.

"Can the Jackal be of some assistance to Fair Lulu?" Spinelli asked.

Lulu was going to answer, but the doctor came in. She asked Spinelli to leave and then took a deep breath.

"Your brother said you had questions for me?" the doctor asked.

"Yes," Lulu answered. "I wanted to know how my baby was. Or if you had checked the baby because I just recently found out and I don't know exactly how the records work here."

"We have run tests, but we are still waiting for the results. You lost a lot of blood, which could have hurt the baby, but there was no spotting or any other indication that you had lost it. When we get the results I will let you know. Until then, it is important for you to remain as relaxed as possible," the doctor advised.

Lulu thanked him and he left the room. Relaxed. She was supposed to be relaxed when she could lose her baby. When the father of her baby didn't know about the pregnancy yet and wasn't allowed to see her.

There was no way she could be relaxed.

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Johnny was sitting on a barstool at Jake's. He was staring at the full beer in front of him desperately wanting to know how Lulu was doing. Why the hell hadn't he stood up to Lucky and Nikolas when they all but shoved him on the elevator? Why hadn't Luke said something? Luke probably hated him for what he did to Lulu, but he would want what Lulu would want. Maybe Lulu didn't want him after all.

Not that it mattered now. Lulu didn't have to want him, but she had to live. She had to make it and Johnny was going crazy not knowing what was happening at the hospital.

Johnny heard a crash and turned to see Spinelli stumbling through the door. Spinelli rushed over to him and began babbling quickly. Johnny cut him off because he couldn't understand what he was saying.

"How is Lulu?" Johnny asked.

"The Fair One has awakened from her post-surgery nap and is stable," Spinelli answered.

Relief rushed over Johnny and then the anxiety built again. He had to ask another question.

"Did she ask about me?"

"The Blonde One wanted to know why the Mob Prince was missing from her bedside. The Jackal informed her of the situation. However, the Jackal urges the Mob Prince to forgo the wishes of the Menacing Brothers of the Blonde One to rush to her aid," Spinelli said quickly.

"Why? What's going on that you aren't telling me about?" Johnny questioned.

"The Blonde One surely needs the father of the Miniature Fair One that grows inside of her!" Spinelli exclaimed.

"The what? You need to speak English, Spinelli. This is obviously important and here you are saying something about a 'Miniature Fair One' and-" Johnny cut himself off when what Spinelli was trying to tell him sunk in.

Johnny spoke slowly, annunciating each syllable to make absolutely sure that Spinelli heard him correctly. "Lulu…is…pregnant?"

Spinelli just nodded his head and Johnny took off. He ran as fast as he could and got in his car. He had to get to Lulu and their baby. Was the baby okay? He hadn't taken the time to ask, but he forced himself to believe everything was fine.

Lulu would be fine, the baby would be fine and they would be a family. They had to be.

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Lulu was trying to stay relaxed. So she kicked everyone out of the room. She didn't want to explain to them why she was nervous. She didn't want to talk at all. Not to them.

She curled up on her side and faced away from the door. It felt like hours since the doctor had talked to her, but according to the clock it had only been twenty minutes. She heard the door open and she sighed. Why wouldn't they leave her alone?

"Go away please," Lulu said angrily.

"I really would like to stay if you don't mind."

Lulu turned toward the most beautiful voice she had ever heard. She saw Johnny standing there and she couldn't help but to burst into tears. He immediately climbed in the bed with her and held her face to his chest and stroked her back soothingly.

When she finished crying, he pulled back slightly and gently caressed her face. She leaned into his touch and was so lost in the moment of being close to him again she almost missed it when he spoke softly.

"Did we lose the baby?" Johnny whispered.

"What? How did you know I was even pregnant? Is that the only reason you came?" Lulu asked and the tears came back to her eyes.

"Shhh, no. I came for you because Spinelli said that you needed me. That was hard for me to believe considering everything that has happened. He told me that you were pregnant and that you had asked about me, so I came," Johnny explained.

"Oh," Lulu responded simply. Then the words came fast and jumbled. "I don't know if the baby is okay yet. I'm waiting for the doctor to come in and I'm so scared. I'm so sorry I hadn't told you, but I wanted to. I just hadn't seen you and when I did-" Johnny cut her off with a kiss.

Their lips melded together and her hands instinctively went to his face to pull him closer. Her reaction caused him to deepen the kiss. He pulled her body towards his and she didn't fight him. For a beautiful moment, they went back in time to the place where everything was clear and simple and all that mattered was that they were together.

Johnny slowly pulled away and Lulu tried to catch her breath. She couldn't remember the last time Johnny had kissed her like that, but to be perfectly honest her brain had lost all coherent thought when his lips had met hers.

"Everything is going to be okay, Lulu," Johnny whispered while tracing her facial features with his thumbs. "I know it will be."

His eyes were confident and she believed him. She leaned into him again and allowed him to just hold her. To make the world go away. She was just drifting off to sleep when the sound of a door opening caused her to stir.

The doctor came into the room and Johnny moved to get out of the bed, but she clung tightly to his hand so he couldn't go far.

"We have the results, Ms. Spencer. Do you mind if this gentleman hears them?" the doctor asked.

"No. He's the father. He has every right to hear them," Lulu answered giving Johnny a hopeful look.

He gave her a confident smile and squeezed her hand tightly. She took a deep breath as the doctor opened his chart.

"Everything looks great," the doctor said with a smile. "We're going to have you stay in the hospital for a few more nights as a precaution, but you and your baby appear to be just fine."

The doctor exited the room and Lulu was once again crying, but these were tears of joy and relief. She looked to Johnny and he had the same tears in his eyes. He climbed back into the bed with her and she laid her head on his chest and listened to his heart beating perfectly in sync with hers.

He kissed her forehead and smiled contently down at her. She returned the smile and closed her eyes. She felt his hand come to her stomach and she covered it with her own.

This was their first family moment and it was perfect.


	7. Two Steps Back

Chapter 6 – Two Steps Back

Lulu woke to arms wrapped around her tightly and a man looking down at her with love and adoration. In that moment, she snapped back to reality.

Johnny was holding her. Johnny. The same Johnny who had lied to her repeatedly, kissed Maxie and landed her cousin in a coma. This was not a good place to be.

She felt Johnny put his hand on her stomach and she looked at him warily. Obviously noticing her uneasiness, he removed it and loosened his grip around her waist.

"What's wrong?" Johnny asked with concern.

"I just…I…why are you here?" Lulu stuttered.

"What do you mean? I told you that I'm here for you and our baby," Johnny answered defensively.

"And, what? I'm supposed to believe you? Pretend like the last few months didn't happen and that a baby will magically make me want to be with you again? That isn't going to happen, Johnny," Lulu shouted.

The worst look of hurt was on Johnny's face. Worse than the night she left him at the apartment. He was obviously not expecting this and Lulu honestly wasn't either. She didn't know what it was that made her snap at him, but there had been a strong warning sign in her head telling her to find a way out of this situation.

"Lulu, I…I know that…I'm not expecting this to happen over night," Johnny started. "After everything that has happened, I don't care if it takes me the rest of my life, I'm going to find away to earn your forgiveness and to make things right."

"There is nothing you could ever do. I am not going to forgive you. I am not going to have my baby grow up with a father who is in and out of its life like mine was. You need to leave," Lulu said sternly.

Johnny looked stunned and Lulu couldn't blame him. She was the liar now because she had already forgiven him and she didn't think for a second that he wouldn't be there for his child.

Johnny got out of the bed and walked toward the door. He looked like Lulu's words had destroyed him. She almost stopped him, but she held her tongue.

"I love you, Lulu. I love our baby and I haven't even held it yet. But I would understand if you don't want to give me the chance. I have done everything wrong in our relationship and you've never been able to count on me. Why would you expect that to change now?" Johnny said, his voice laced with sadness.

Lulu's heart was breaking all over again. He was going to leave again because she had asked him too. He was blaming himself again for mistakes as if he was the only one in the world who made them. Why couldn't she find it in herself to stop him?

"If you ever change your mind, I will be here in a heartbeat," Johnny said and chuckled a little. "That's not the best word choice. I am already here with every heartbeat. You are my heart, Lulu. You and this baby that we created together. I will love you both forever, even if you choose to never see me again."

Johnny gave her one last look and walked out of the door and seemingly out of Lulu's life forever. She watched him go and she didn't cry. Not this time. Instead she brought a hand to her chest in an effort to cover the gaping hole she was sure was there. Johnny was her heart, too.

And her heart had just walked away forever.

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Johnny had never been more hurt and confused in his entire life. Last night he was sure that he had a chance to work it out with Lulu. A chance to live again. But now it seemed as though he had been wrong. There was no reunion with Lulu. No being a father. No happily ever after. Not that he deserved any of those things, but he had wished for them with everything inside of him.

Last night when he kissed Lulu to calm her down he had expected her to pull away, but she hadn't. She kissed him back. She clung to him and she allowed him to hold her all night. He thought that had meant that she had found a way to forgive him, but that apparently wasn't the case.

He was walking on the docks and Lulu's words were ringing in his ears. He wasn't watching where he was going and he collided with someone.

"Sorry, I wasn't-" Johnny stopped his apology mid sentence when he realized who he had bumped in to. Ethan Lovett. "Never mind. I should have hit you harder," Johnny said angrily.

"Sorry, mate. I don't know what your problem is, but I would love to see you try to take it out on me," Ethan replied, practically goading Johnny into rearranging his face.

"Don't tempt me," Johnny countered.

"Wait a minute. I've seen that angry look before. Did Lulu dismiss you again? Good for her. She is-" Ethan's words were cut off by Johnny's left fist connecting with his face.

Johnny looked down at Ethan who had fallen after taking the hit. He wanted him to get up. To try to fight back. After everything that had just happened with Lulu he had enough frustration to end this guy's life with a few punches.

"So I guess I'm right then, mate? After being shot, she still didn't want you. Pity for you, but not for me," Ethan said.

Johnny wanted to kill Ethan. His anger was at an all time high and he clenched his fist in preparation of delivering another blow to Ethan's skull when he stopped himself.

What good was it? Killing Ethan Lovett, the nothing that he was, would not help at all. The only thing that would help was Lulu and that was something he couldn't have.

"You will stay the hell away from Lulu unless she asks you to be in her life," Johnny started, voice dripping with hatred. "If I hear that you are trying to force yourself on her in any way that makes her uncomfortable, there will be nowhere you can run to get away from the wrath of the Zacchara name."

He took one last glance at Ethan who seemed to have been affected by Johnny's threat. Johnny walked away and kept walking until he got to his car. He looked over at the passenger seat and realized it would always be empty. Never again would he speed down the road with Lulu holding his hand and laughing heartily.

Never again would Johnny be complete.

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Lulu had been staring at the door for almost two hours. She was confused to say the least. After Johnny had kissed her, she had let go of all reservations and let him hold her. It was what she needed and she used him. This morning she knew it had been wrong, but she made it worse by dismissing him coldly. She had lead him on and then pushed him away.

"Johnny, why do we do this? Why can't we be happy together?" she asked out loud to herself.

What had occurred between them in the last twenty-four hours was just a slightly altered version of the same old song and dance that Johnny and Lulu always shared. Come together and then push apart.

Lulu heard the door opened and her heart skipped a beat. She looked up and was surprised by who walked through the door.

"Mom?" Lulu asked. "What are you doing here?"

"Hey sweetie," Laura answered. "I got a call saying my daughter was shot, so I got on the first flight. I'm so glad you're going to be okay."

"I'm not okay. I never will be. I have once again made a mess of everything," Lulu said sadly.

"Honey, what's wrong? Did the doctor give you some bad news today?" Laura asked concerned.

"No. I told you it was me. I did this. I ruined everything," Lulu cried.

"You're going to have to give me details, Lulu. Start from the beginning," Laura said.

Lulu relayed the details of the breakup with Johnny and the baby. She told him about saving Luke and being shot. She ended with recounting the events of last night and this morning. When she finished, Laura pulled her into an emotional hug and Lulu let go and cried.

"I know you don't want to hear what I have to say, but I think I need to say it anyway. Okay?" Laura said.

"Okay," Lulu responded.

"Johnny hurt you worse than anyone ever has. Right?" Laura asked and Lulu nodded and Laura continued. "The only reason he was able to do that was because you love him more than anyone you have ever loved. More than me, your brothers or your father. The only person you may love more is that baby inside of you. I know you were scared to love so much because you were afraid to hurt that much. But what you need to realize is that he can never hurt you enough to make you stop loving him. Because the love will always overcome the pain."

Laura's words brought tears to Lulu's eyes. Her mother was right, yet again. She did love Johnny more than anything or anyone and she knew she would never stop. As hard as it may be to find a way to fix things she wanted to. She wanted to make things right with Johnny and be a family.

"How do you always know how to get through to me? To say exactly what I need to hear to let go of my stupid doubts and just follow my heart?" Lulu asked.

"It wouldn't work if I wasn't telling you to do what you wanted to do. You just needed someone to tell you out loud that it was okay to love Johnny despite his faults and mistakes. Love will never be perfect. And honestly I can't think of a reason why you would want it to be. The little imperfections are what make living and loving great," Laura said thoughtfully.

"It's the big imperfections that I'm worried about, Mom. What if we work things out and it goes bad again? How many times can I handle the heartbreak? How can I raise a baby with someone if I don't trust them?" Lulu questioned.

"A million things could go wrong. I've always thought of you as one to be willing to take the risk. Risk trusting Johnny again and giving him another chance," Laura said.

"I don't know if I can. I think if Johnny hurt me again it would kill me. I can't risk it. What kind of mother would I be if I did?" Lulu asked rhetorically.

Lulu knew her mother was right. She wanted to forgive Johnny and be with him again. She did love him despite everything and she would never stop. But she needed more time to think. Letting her heart run her life had gotten her into trouble before. She didn't want that to happen again.

If she and Johnny were going to work it out, it would be because it was the right thing in her head and her heart.


	8. Can't Take the Pain

**Chapter 7 – Can't Take the Pain**

Luke walked onto the Haunted Star to find Johnny standing by the piano. He watched him run his hands lightly over the keys, but not pushing any down. Johnny seemed to be lost in thought and Luke couldn't help but wonder what he was doing there. After everything Lulu had told him about their breakup and all of the promises of pain Luke had made to Johnny should he ever hurt her, the haunted star was the last place Luke expected to find Johnny.

"What brings you to the Haunted Star, John?" Luke asked stirring Johnny from his thoughts.

"Huh? Oh, hello Luke. I came by to get the list of names of the men you played poker with that night that kidnapped you," Johnny replied.

"Why would you need that? It doesn't concern you," Luke said.

"Actually it does. See your daughter is in the hospital because by helping rescue you, she put them on her trail and ended up shot," Johnny said angrily.

"Like I said, it doesn't concern you. Lulu no longer concerns you. Unless you somehow convinced her to give you another chance," Luke countered.

"It's obvious she doesn't concern you either. If you have to know, she hasn't given me another chance and I didn't ask for one. But she is pregnant with my child. That means, she concerns me. That means I need the list of names, so I can take care of the mess you made and remove Lulu and my child from danger," Johnny said, his voice rising with every word.

"Are you trying to suggest that I am to blame for this? I didn't ask her to come after me and I didn't pull the trigger of the gun that shot her," Luke said.

"You're right. I guess you just expected Lulu to do what you've done to her for her entire life. Ignore you and not help when you were in trouble," Johnny scoffed.

"If you want to say something to me, John, just say it," Luke demanded.

"I don't want to say anything, Luke. I just want you to give me the list, so I can take care of the threat and move on," Johnny said calmly.

"Move on? What exactly do you mean by that?" Luke asked, calming as well.

"Lulu thinks it would be best if I'm not involved in raising our child. So, once I know she's safe from this threat, I am going to leave town. I don't want to be a reminder of a mistake to Lulu any time we happen to run into each other," Johnny answered.

"And you're just going to accept that? Not being there for the birth or first bike ride. First day of kindergarten or graduation. Do you think that you can live with that?" Luke asked.

"You make it look easy," Johnny said snidely and then took a deep breath. "It's not what I want. But it is my own fault and I'm going to take responsibility for my mistakes. Lulu's happiness is the most important thing to me and she deserves to have me do one thing to make her happy."

Luke looked at Johnny and saw the heartbreak in his eyes. He had made mistakes with Lulu, but the regret was obvious. Now he was going to be shut out of his child's life and wasn't even going to fight it.

"Sometimes my daughter doesn't know what will make her happy until she's lost it. I doubt she would want her son or daughter growing up the way she did. That's a mistake that I do take responsibility for. Even if I don't always show it," Luke said.

Johnny shook his head and softly said, "She made it pretty clear to me what she wanted. Twice now, actually. I just need that list if you don't mind."

Luke gave Johnny the list of names and watched him leave the Haunted Star. It was probably wrong of him to feel sympathy for the man who had hurt his daughter, but Luke did. Lulu had clearly broken Johnny and Luke wondered if she even knew it. If she realized the damage she had done and was doing by keeping Johnny from his baby.

He quickly got his opportunity to ask her, when she ambled onto the Haunted Star.

"Cupcake, you're glowing," Luke said as Lulu approached him.

"Who told you? I wanted to be the one who broke the news," Lulu said.

"John told me when he was here earlier," Luke replied.

"Why would Johnny come here? And why would he tell you about the baby? That wasn't his news to tell," Lulu questioned.

"He is the father, Lulu. I think he has every right to tell whoever he wants. But still, he didn't tell me just to tell me. He wanted to take care of my problem with the men I played poker with. I told him it wasn't his business and he informed me it was. Once I knew about the baby, I gave him the information he wanted and he left," Luke explained.

"What's he going to do? Is it dangerous?" Lulu asked nervously.

"He didn't say and I didn't ask. The only thing we talked about was him not being involved in the baby's life. Something you requested, I understand," Luke responded.

"Yes. I know it may seem like the wrong thing to do, but it's better for my child this way," Lulu said defensively.

"Gumdrop, I'm not one to give advice," Luke started. "That's your mother and I know she probably gave you some while she was here, but I will say one thing. If you don't know it's the right thing to do, then don't do it. Take some more time to think about it. Know you're doing the right thing."

Johnny had packed all of his things and was on his way to Sonny's to tell Claudia goodbye before he left. He didn't know where he was going, but he was hoping that he was finally doing something right. He had never done it before, even when he tried, and this one time he wanted to make a good decision.

He parked his car and entered the house and waited for Claudia in the living room. His mind wandered to the time Lulu had brought him to the house to prove to him that Sonny wasn't a bad guy. She had been proven wrong and he had kissed her before pushing her away yet again. At the time he had justified the mixed signals by telling himself he didn't want to have any regrets. But now he knew that wasn't true. He may have pushed her away to keep her safe, but he kissed her to keep her near. Even then he couldn't imagine his life without her and that was still true.

Claudia coming down the stairs shook him out of his thoughts.

"What are you doing here? Is something wrong?" Claudia asked.

"I need a favor. I need you to pay off these guys on this list. Give them as much as they ask for, but make sure they take it and leave. Once they get the money, they have no reason to show their faces in Port Charles again and I need you to let them know the misfortune that would come their way if they do," Johnny said.

"Sure, John, anything for you. But who are they and why do you need to pay them off?" Claudia questioned.

"These are the men responsible for shooting Lulu. I can't be sure if one of them pulled the trigger or not, but they did it in response to Luke cheating them at cards. I had Spinelli get me as much information as he could and then I got the names from Luke. I need to take care of this to keep Lulu and...to keep Lulu safe," Johnny said, stopping himself from mentioning the baby.

Johnny could tell Claudia hadn't missed the slip and he quickly tried to cover by giving her the rest of his news.

"Claudia, there is something else," Johnny started. "I'm leaving town. I...I talked to Lulu and...she didn't want...Lulu doesn't want to try again. She doesn't want me in her life and I'm going to respect that. I don't want to hang around town and be a constant reminder of her pain and I don't know if I could take seeing her everyday. Especially when..." Johnny trailed off, again trying to keep the news of the baby from Claudia.

"When what, John?" Claudia asked.

"When she moves on with someone else," Johnny covered.

"I don't know what it is you're hiding or why you think you need to hide it from me, but I think if you're going to leave that you should at least have the decency to be honest about why you are leaving," Claudia said softly.

"Lulu's pregnant. She doesn't want me and I think maybe I could handle that, but she also doesn't want me to be a father to my child. That I can't take. I can't sit around town and watch her stomach grow. See her pushing a stroller through the park or being surrounded by people cooing over my child while I have nothing to do with my son or daughter," Johnny explained.

"She really is pregnant?" Claudia said laughing to herself. Catching the look that Johnny gave her she quickly explained.

"I'm glad you helped her. I want you to keep doing that, please. If Lulu needs anything, you give it to her. For me. I love her and that won't change. No matter how many miles I put between us. Please?" Johnny begged.

He exhaled when Claudia nodded her head. Claudia wanted to know where he was going, but Johnny wouldn't tell her. He wasn't completely sure himself, but he wouldn't have told her even if he did. He promised to call soon to let her know he was safe. He hugged her goodbye and walked to his car.

Sitting in the car he looked to the passenger seat and imagined that Lulu was with him. He imagined that they were finally running away and leaving everything behind. He closed his eyes and he could almost feel her take his hand the way she always did when they were driving. He opened his eyes and reality rushed over him.

She wasn't there. He was alone. He couldn't help but to find it fitting. He was getting exactly what he thought he deserved.

Lulu had been driving all day. A habit she had developed from Johnny no doubt. After both of her parents had basically told her to give Johnny another chance and her heart wanting the same thing, she needed to take the time to figure out if it really was the right thing to do. Could she risk her heart again? Would he break it if she did? After everything she had been through she wanted a moment of peace, but she didn't have the time. She needed to figure out what was best for her and the baby.

Lulu knew that she wanted a life with Johnny. She wanted to see him hold his child. That's why she couldn't get that image out of her head. Johnny holding their baby by her bedside. Maybe that was her head approving what her heart wanted.

She knew what she wanted and she quickly turned her car around so she could go get it. She knew Claudia could tell her where Johnny was. Johnny. That's what she wanted. Risks, heartbreaks and all else aside. She wanted Johnny and now that she knew it, her car couldn't get her to him fast enough.

She ran into Sonny's house and Claudia stared at her wide-eyed while Lulu caught her breath.

"I need...to talk..to Johnny," Lulu gasped.

"He's not here. He's gone," Claudia stated simply.

"Gone? Gone where? For how long?" Lulu asked.

"Forever. You wanted him gone, so he's gone. He left and he's not looking back. He told me that's what you wanted and he wanted nothing more than to make you happy," Claudia explained.

_**Gone**_. How could Johnny be gone? The thought refused to sink in to Lulu's mind. After finally discovering what she wanted and going after it, Lulu's dreams were again being crushed.

"I did tell him that. I was confused and I said things I shouldn't have. But I know now that I was wrong. I can't believe he left so soon. I thought he loved me. But obviously not, at least not enough to fight for me," Lulu said, feeling sorry for herself.

"Excuse me? You can't honestly think that Johnny doesn't love you more than anything. Have you forgotten what happened after you killed Logan? How Johnny took the blame and refused to implicate you? How he faced the death penalty while you remained safe? How close he was to a lethal injection because of your mistake and all the while he only focused on your recovery?" Claudia yelled.

"No. I will never forget what Johnny did for me. How could you ask me that?" Lulu said, taken aback by Claudia's words.

"I needed to make sure that you remembered. I needed to make sure that you were still grateful. Now I need to make sure that you realize that the only reason Johnny left is because he was trying to make you happy. He blames himself for everything that went wrong between you two. Maybe he should, I don't know all of the details. What I do know is he refused to fight for you because _**you **_asked him not to," Claudia explained.

Lulu knew Claudia was telling the truth. Taking the time to figure things out had cost her. Johnny was gone and Lulu had no idea how to find him.

"Do you know where he went? I know I don't deserve to have you tell me, but I want to find him and tell him I was wrong. That I want him to be a..." Lulu trailed off realizing what she was saying.

"It's okay, Lulu. I know about the baby. For the baby's sake, if I knew where he was, I would tell you. For John's sake too. As much as I used to hate you, I realize now that you were the best thing that ever happened to him. But I don't know where he is. He said he didn't even know, but I doubt he would have told me anyway," Claudia said.

Lulu thanked Claudia and slowly walked out of the house. Johnny was gone. Forever, Claudia had said. The man she loved and who loved her back. The man that was the father of her child and that she was supposed to raise a family with. The man that was her soul mate.

_**Gone.**_

A simple four letter word had never affected Lulu so much.


	9. Pursuit

**Chapter 8 – Pursuit**

Lulu barreled into the Haunted Star on a mission. Her father had talked to Johnny. Maybe he knew something about where he had gone. Maybe he could help her fix the mess she had made.

She couldn't see anyone in the main room so she called out for her dad. She heard a noise and breathed a sigh of relief. Her relief left her quickly when she realized it was Ethan, not her father.

"Hello, love," Ethan said casually. "Luke isn't here. I haven't seen him today. Is there something I can help you with?"

"No, I just need to talk to my dad. Could you tell him I came by?" Lulu asked.

She was quickly running out of options. Lulu needed to find Johnny before he got too far. The man she loved was slipping farther and farther away from her with every second and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She had finally pushed him too hard and now the baby inside of her was going to pay the price.

Her baby would grow up without a father just as Lulu had. Why did she always have to be so stubborn? She smiled a little at the memory of one of the drives she had taken with Johnny.

"_Lulu, we are not going to stop at Starbucks," Johnny insisted._

"_Yes we are!"_

_Lulu had been begging Johnny for over an hour to stop at the coffee shop because she needed caffeine. _

"_We can get coffee anywhere. The only reason you want to stop there is to get one of those muffins," Johnny argued._

"_What if that's true? Are you going to keep me from my muffin?" Lulu pouted._

"_Why do you have to be so stubborn? Can't I win one of our little disputes?" Johnny asked with a hint of a smile._

"_No. You will always give in to me because you find me irresistible," Lulu said smiling._

"_I can't argue with that," Johnny said as he pulled into the Starbucks parking lot. "But can I ask you one thing?"_

"_Anything," Lulu said leaning closer to him after he parked the car._

"_Am I as irresistible to you as your muffins?" Johnny asked, now only inches from Lulu._

_Lulu smirked. "It's a tossup," she said as she leaned in and crashed her lips against his._

Lulu felt a hand on her shoulder shake her out of her memory. She looked up hoping to see Luke, but it was Ethan again.

"Are you okay, love? You seem a million miles away." Ethan said with concern.

"I'm fine. Just tell my dad I was here," she said walking away.

"Wait. You seem stressed. Why don't I take you to dinner to get your mind off of things?" Ethan offered.

"No. I don't want to go to dinner with you or anyone else. I don't need you to help me take my mind off of things. I need you to tell my dad I came by," Lulu said angrily.

Lulu wasn't exactly angry with Ethan, but he was keeping her from finding Johnny and that was unacceptable.

"Look, I'm in love with Johnny. I always will be and right now, I need to find him and make sure he knows that. I doubt you want to help me do that. Please just tell my dad I came by," Lulu said.

Lulu left the Haunted Star and knew where to go next. There was only one person in the world who could help her. He could find anyone and he would do anything for her and her Miniature Fair One.

* * *

Spinelli was working hard trying to find customers for his new PI business. He needed a break from the tireless search and decided to retrieve his favorite refreshments. He came out of the kitchen with his barbecue chips and orange soda and heard someone knocking on the door.

He went and opened the door and barely caught a glimpse of Lulu as she ran through the door. She immediately went to his computer and picked it up to hand it to him. She shoved it in his face and he tried to catch what she was saying, but she was speaking fast, even for him.

"Spinelli, will you help me?" Lulu finished, leaving Spinelli to wonder what she had asked him.

"Fair One, the Jackal would love to assist you on any quest, but would appreciate a slightly slower version of the Blonde One's request," Spinelli said.

Lulu smiled and shook her head at the obvious irony. Spinelli couldn't understand her, not the other way around.

"I _**need **_to find Johnny! It's important. I told him I didn't want him in my life or the baby's and he _**left.**_ He left town and didn't tell anyone, not even Claudia, where he went. I have to get to him to tell him that I was wrong and that I do want him. For me and the baby," Lulu explained.

"The Jackal is surprised that the Mob Prince would so willingly accept the Fair One's wishes," Spinelli commented.

"I didn't give him a choice. I didn't ask him to leave town, but I basically told him I never wanted to see him again. He just wanted to make me happy," Lulu said.

"The Jackal will assist the Blonde One in her mission to find the Father-To-Be. Does Fair Lulu possess any information about the Mob Prince's recent activities in town?" Spinelli asked.

"I know he went to see my dad and Claudia before he left Port Charles. That's about it. Do you think you can find him based on that little bit of information?" Lulu wondered.

"The Assassin of the Internet can and will find the Missing Mob Prince. He will work day and night to make the Blonde One's wish come true and to reunite the parents of the Miniature Fair One," Spinelli proclaimed.

"The sooner the better, Spinelli. I need to get to Johnny as soon as possible and make things right," Lulu said.

Spinelli begin typing on his computer and desperately seeking any information on Johnny. He knew it could be days before Johnny used a credit card or something else to put him on Spinelli's radar. He wasn't going to tell Lulu that, though. He wanted her to stay as positive as possible.

After an hour he asked Lulu to stop pacing, so he could concentrate better. After another hour, he took a break and fixed Lulu a healthy arrangement of food. She looked skeptical, but he insisted on feeding the baby something nourishing. After four total hours of searching, Spinelli found Johnny.

"The Jackal is successful!" he exclaimed.

"Where?" Lulu asked.

Spinelli gave Lulu directions on how to get to Johnny and watched her smile. Obviously Johnny was somewhere familiar to Lulu. She ran out of the door, somehow faster than she had entered and Spinelli collapsed on the couch exhausted.

He only hoped that his two friends would work it out. Neither Johnny nor Lulu could be called perfect, but Spinelli knew they were definitely better together.

Lulu packed as many things as she could. She didn't know exactly why she had so many things. If things went the way she wanted, she would return to Port Charles with Johnny and the clothes wouldn't be needed. But she wanted to be prepared.

On the way back to Wyndamere from Jason's penthouse, Lulu had decided that she would chase Johnny across the country if that's what it took. She didn't know what exactly had happened between the morning at the hospital and now, but her mind had changed. The days that had passed had been lonely and filled with pain. Lulu knew now that she not only did not want to live the rest of her life like that, but also could not live the rest of her life like that. She _**would**_ _**not **_live her life like that.

She threw the bag she had over her shoulder and headed out the door. She left Nikolas a note explaining where she was going. She shoved the bag into the trunk of her car and got into the driver's seat.

She drove quickly and carefully while following Spinelli's directions. Not that she needed them. She smiled at the thought of Johnny. She allowed herself to dream about the future they would have with their child. That ever present picture of Johnny holding his child took hold of her mind yet again. He was holding the baby so carefully and grinning like the proudest dad in the world. Her heart swelled at the thought. She couldn't wait to see it actually happen.

Her foot pressed down a little more on the gas pedal.

"I'm coming for you Johnny."


	10. Everything Old is New Again

**Chapter 9 – Everything Old is New Again**

Lulu took the final turn and her breathing began to speed up. Johnny was less than a mile away. Or at least she hoped. She hadn't allowed herself to actually consider the possibility that Johnny might have already left the cabin. Their cabin. He went to a place where they had gone together. She smiled, knowing in her heart he was still there. The closer she got the more she could feel Johnny's presence. He was there and she was going to reunite her family.

She pulled up to the cabin and saw the familiar yellow car already parked there. Her heart was beating a million times per second and she couldn't steady herself. The affect Johnny had on her was amazing. He was inside and she was about to faint. Suddenly the doubt started to creep into her mind again. What if it was too late? What if Johnny had decided that he didn't want to be a father? Was this a mistake?

She put her hand back on the key to start the engine. She was shaking and she couldn't bring herself to turn the key. She took a deep breath and collected herself. All the what ifs didn't matter. Well, one did. What if she never took the chance to talk to Johnny? The worst that could happen was that he had changed his mind. She could live with that. She could not live with never knowing.

She pulled the key out of the ignition and took one final deep breath before exiting the car. She couldn't help but to wonder how Johnny had gotten in the cabin. Was he breaking and entering again? She smiled at the thought.

She found herself at the door and didn't know whether to knock or just go in. She settled on knocking. She raised one hand and put the other on her stomach in an effort to calm her nerves. She knocked on the door and waited. It was probably only a few seconds before he answered but it felt like years.

He pulled the door open and he was wearing the jeans she thought he looked best in. His shirt fit him tightly and showed off his marvelous physique. Lulu forgot to breathe.

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Johnny looked around the cabin. He had owned this place for awhile, but had not been back since the day he bought it. That day, he thought he would never see Lulu again and he wanted to have a place to remember her by. Now that he knew he would never see Lulu again, it was logical for him to come here to clear his head. He was supposed to be running far away, but he couldn't. He needed to feel close to Lulu. He wasn't ready to let her go just yet, even if he should.

He considered going to find something to eat, but he wasn't hungry. He decided to lie down on the couch and attempt to sleep. He had just drifted off to sleep when he heard a knock on the door. He got up wondering who could possibly be there to see him. He assumed someone who lived nearby was coming to investigate the new neighbor although he had not seen any houses.

He wiped the sleep away from his eyes and opened the door. He was face to face with Lulu and she looked amazing. Her hair was in the soft curls he loved so much and her clothes hugged her in all the right places. Johnny forgot to breathe.

He stood there looking at her for a few minutes and finally realized he was dreaming. Lulu wasn't really there. He ran a hand over his eyes and when he opened his eyes again she was still there, staring at him just the way he was staring at her.

"Are you real?" he asked, not thinking he said it out loud.

Lulu smiled and nodded her head and Johnny realized that he had asked the question out loud. He moved out of the doorway and motioned for her to come in. He had a million thoughts running through his head, but he kept coming back to the same one. He decided to just ask her.

"Why did you come here?" he asked looking into her eyes.

"I thought you would want to know how I knew where you were," Lulu replied. Johnny didn't miss the way she avoided his question or the way her eyes were wandering the room.

"I have a lot of questions, but the one I need you to answer is the one I asked," Johnny started. When Lulu didn't answer, he repeated himself. "Why did you come here?"

"I needed to talk to you," Lulu answered.

"Well I figured that," Johnny said starting to get frustrated.

She was dancing around his questions. As if she wasn't torturing him enough by asking him to stay away from her and their baby. He took her in again and noticed she was still touching her stomach. She hadn't moved her hand since she came in and he was suddenly overcome with worry.

"Is the baby okay?" Johnny asked.

"Yes, we're both fine," Lulu said with a smile.

Johnny's relief was replaced by a burning curiosity. Why else would Lulu be here? He wanted to ask her again, but doubted she would answer. Maybe he should try a different approach.

"I assume Spinelli helped you find me," Johnny commented.

"Yeah, he is amazing with the computer. I have no idea how he does it," Lulu said.

Lulu's eyes were all over the room and Johnny knew that the reason she came to find him was important to her.

"I would think he did it because you asked him to. That was probably more than enough motivation for him," Johnny said carefully. He wanted to find out why Lulu was here. For him? Definitely not, but for some reason and Johnny intended to figure it out.

"We aren't as close as we used to be. A lot has changed, but he still did it for me," Lulu responded.

"What's changed? I think him doing this is proof that it hasn't changed as much as you think it has," Johnny said.

"He did it for the baby more than for me I think," Lulu said and then looked to the ground as if she'd said something she didn't mean to.

Johnny was trying hard to read her, but she was being impossible as usual. The mention of the baby just confused him more.

"What does you being here have to do with the baby? Lulu, please just tell me," Johnny begged.

Johnny saw tears form in her eyes and it almost killed him. Something was wrong and he was once again making it worse. He wanted more than anything to hold her, but he imagined that would only make things harder for her.

"I'm here because you left," Lulu started. "And of course it took you leaving for me to realize what an idiot I was. How could I have asked you to not be a father to your child?"

Johnny was reeling. He had left for her and she had come for him. But not because she wanted him as anything more than a father. He was filled with mixed emotions. Elation because he was going to get to father his child. Devastation because he had still lost the love of his life.

"You want me to be a dad?" Johnny asked.

"Yes. I want our child to know how amazing you are. I want you to be there every step of the way," Lulu explained.

"I would love that, as long as it wouldn't make you uncomfortable," Johnny said.

"Why would it make me uncomfortable? It's the right thing for us to be a family," Lulu said and Johnny could tell she had once again said something she had meant to keep to herself.

"A family? What exactly do you mean by that?" Johnny questioned. He couldn't help but to be hopeful.

He watched Lulu take a deep breath and walk to sit on the couch. She patted the spot beside her and he obliged her request. She once again drew in a breath, but this time held it for awhile before letting it out. She was preparing herself for something and Johnny was anxious to hear what it was. Everything inside of him was praying that she had changed her mind about him, too.

"I'm in love with you," Lulu said, finally looking Johnny in the eye.

Johnny was shocked. Even wishing she felt that way after everything couldn't prepare him for her actually speaking the words. He immediately wanted to reciprocate the sentiment, but she put her fingertips to his lips so she could continue.

"I wanted to hate you for everything you did. I honestly tried because it seemed like the right thing to do. It seemed like if I could hate you, I would stop hurting so much. But I couldn't hate you and it did hurt. No matter the reasons you gave or the apologies you made, it hurt me worse than anything I had ever experienced," Lulu said. She took a breath and continued. "I realize now the pain was just part of the healing process. My mind was coming to terms with everything. Unfortunately, it took you leaving town for me to finally realize that I could never hate you. I love you entirely too much. I love you with my whole heart and I thought I had accepted that, but I hadn't.

"Loving you that much still scares the hell out of me. Needing someone the way I need you...I don't know...it's just not something I thought I wanted. I thought I wanted to be independent. To live life on my own and just take what comes, you know? But living without you has proven to be virtually impossible," she finished.

Johnny couldn't breathe. He was pretty sure he was in shock from Lulu's words. She reached up and lightly brushed his face and he realized she was wiping away tears that had involuntarily fallen down his face. She loved him. He loved her. Was it too good to be true to think they could be happy?

"Say something," Lulu begged, pulling Johnny from his thoughts.

"I don't know what to say," Johnny said and Lulu's face fell. "No, not like that. I'm just afraid to say anything that ruins this moment. I mean, I was pretty sure you did hate me and I didn't blame you at all for feeling that way. Hearing you say that you love me is like a dream come true."

He moved his hands up to grip hers which were still on his face. He brought her fingertips to his lips and kissed them tenderly. She smiled and he did as well.

"I love your fingers," he said as he moved his lips to her wrist and up the inside of her arm. "I love your arms and your shoulders. Your neck and your chin."

Johnny's lips brushed across the areas of skin he was talking about. He positioned his lips inches from hers and whispered, "I love your lips," before giving her a short, soft kiss. He pulled back slightly and stared into her eyes. He put his hands on either side of her face and closed his eyes at the softness of her skin.

"Most of all, Lulu, I love you. You are what love is to me and I will love you forever," Johnny smiled and moved one hand to her stomach. "You and this one right here. Our baby. There is nothing more in the universe I want than to be with you and our child. Forever."

Lulu smiled and placed one of her hands on his cheek and the other on top of Johnny's hand on her stomach. He was in awe of how much love he felt in that moment. The love of a perfect family. It was a completely new feeling to him, but he knew he would never let it go.

He leaned in and connected their lips once again. The kiss started slow, both of them reveling in the feeling of their lips touching once again. Soon Lulu deepened the kiss and it became more passionate. His hands moved to her waist and she gripped his back. Their tongues battled and Lulu ran her hands down his body needing to feel his skin underneath her fingertips. She scraped her fingernails against his lower back and he sighed into the kiss. She pulled back long enough to remove his shirt. He wanted to feel her lips again, but she connected her lips to his neck and began trailing kisses down to his chest. He pulled her into his lap so she was sitting astride him and pulled her shirt over her head. Their lips met again and the passion continued to grow.

His hands ran all over her back, caressing her in a way that made Lulu gasp and pull back for air. Johnny tried to assault her neck, but Lulu climbed off his lap. She laughed at the confused expression on his face and smiled seductively. She unbuttoned her jeans and the zipper came undone soon after. He watched her as she slid the jeans down her legs and was now standing before him in her underwear. He stood and kissed her quickly before doing the same to his jeans. Their lips met again and he picked her up in his arms and carried her to the bedroom of the cabin.

He laid her down beneath him on the bed and kissed her with all of the love he felt for her. She returned the kiss the same way and moved to remove his boxers. Johnny broke their kiss and his lips traveled down the length of her body, removing the rest of her clothes along the way. He found his way back to her lips and then pulled away to look into her eyes. He was relieved to see nothing but love. No trace of doubt or regret, just happiness and passion. He shifted slightly and Lulu closed her eyes in pure bliss. They made love slowly at first, savoring each and every feeling and touch. Johnny kept his lips attached to Lulu's neck while she voiced her appreciation for his touch. Johnny pressed his lips to hers as the passion climaxed and then collapsed into Lulu's arms.

Lulu held him and stroked his back lovingly while they both attempted to steady their breathing. He pulled away from her and she snuggled into his side while he wrapped his arms around her. He kissed her forehead gently and she smiled.

"I love you, Johnny. I don't ever want to be away from you again," Lulu pleaded.

"You won't be. I'm never letting go of us again. I promise," Johnny said and Lulu smiled. "I love you, Lulu. I always will."

"Always," Lulu agreed as they drifted to sleep in each other's arms.

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A/N – Thank you to everyone who is reading! I love all the reviews I get and I hope to get a lot from this chapter! There is only one chapter and the epilogue remaining. It's crazy how fast this has gone!


	11. The Rest Melts Away

**Chapter 10 – The Rest Melts Away**

Johnny woke first and immediately tightened his grip on the blonde in his arms. He needed to make sure she didn't go anywhere. Not now, or ever again. He felt her breath against his chest as she snuggled deeper into his side while she slept. She was even more beautiful than he remembered. He planned to wake up this way every morning for the rest of their lives. He gave her a small kiss on her shoulder and she smiled, awake now.

"How long have you been watching me?" Lulu asked.

"Long enough to notice that you still try to snuggle with me in your sleep," Johnny replied with a smile.

"Are you surprised?" Lulu laughed.

"It's just been awhile. I mean, even in the end when we were together, we weren't together. If that makes sense," Johnny said.

"It makes sense. We should probably talk about what is going to happen when we go back to Port Charles. I mean living arrangements and everything. I know the birth is still awhile away, but we should discuss that too. There will be a lot of changes coming up in our lives," Lulu said, speaking quickly.

"Slow down, Lulu," Johnny said rubbing her back. "We should talk, but we need to take it one step at a time. The one thing I know for sure is that stress on you is not good. We need to keep mommy and baby healthy."

Lulu couldn't help but smile at the glow Johnny had. Lulu had never heard of the father glowing, but Johnny did. He was smiling from ear to ear with the slightest mention of his child.

"Are you scared? About being a dad, I mean," Lulu asked.

"Out of my mind. But I can do it as long as I have you," he answered. "We may not be perfect, but we both have a pretty good idea about what not to do when raising a kid."

"That's true," Lulu agreed.

"What about you? Are you scared about being a mom?" Johnny questioned.

"Definitely. I don't have any kind of example to follow and all the books I've read say it will come to me naturally. I don't even know what that means," Lulu said.

"You read books? I'm behind. But we'll learn together, Lulu. Together, okay?" Johnny said.

"Together. I'm really loving that word," Lulu said with a smile.

"I really love you," Johnny replied.

"I know," Lulu said. "But I wouldn't mind you showing me again."

Johnny smiled and pulled her to him. He kissed her softly, yet passionately.

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After making love two more times, Johnny begrudgingly got out of bed and took a shower while Lulu slept. When he finished, he redressed and went back into the bedroom. He noticed Lulu was missing from bed and he immediately worried. He left the bedroom and found Lulu checking every cabinet in the kitchen only to be disappointed.

"What are you looking for?" Johnny asked.

"Food," Lulu replied.

"I can go get something," he said.

"Why are you staying here anyway? Does the owner know you're here?" Lulu wondered.

"Yes he does. He knows you're here too," Johnny said and laughed at the confused look that Lulu gave him.

"How would the owner know I'm here?" Lulu asked.

"Because I own this place," he said and laughed as surprise filled her eyes. "I bought it to remember you by after my father tried to kill you. I thought you would run for the hills and I wanted to have something to hold onto," Johnny explained.

"Now you have me to hold onto," Lulu smiled.

"It's still surreal to me. Having you forgive me and wanting to be a family. Even you being pregnant. I just can't wrap my head around it," he said.

"Don't think that way. Not anymore okay?" Lulu said.

"What way?" Johnny asked, confused.

"Like everything is a surprise. I know that you think you deserve to be miserable for the rest of your life. Maybe you do. Maybe we both do, but we won't be. We'll be happy because we have each other and our baby. As long as you just let it happen. Stop worrying about the pending doom that will pull us apart. Assume that we are going to make it this time," she explained.

"That's scary," Johnny said with a small laugh. "Not only can you read my mind, but you want me to expect happiness. That's scary for me. I've always guarded myself from being happy because I grew up surrounded by anything good being shot to hell."

"I know. I don't expect you to overnight become the most positive person in the world, but I do expect you to be able to raise your child with hope for the future," Lulu said.

"I want to. I want to teach he or she that love doesn't kill. It's what makes life worth living. Just like their mom taught me," Johnny replied.

Lulu smiled and he wrapped his arms around her. He held her for a few minutes and then she went to get dressed. When she came back Johnny had gotten them some breakfast and coffee. They ate in silence for awhile and finally Johnny broke the silence.

"So you mentioned living arrangements earlier. What do you think we should do? I don't want you to feel pressure in any way, so I want whatever you want," he said.

"I don't want to rush things. But I want you with me. We definitely aren't having any other roommates though. We need a place of our own, big enough to raise a baby in, but small enough to feel close to each other," Lulu said thoughtfully.

"Well, we could stay here for awhile. Until we find a place in town. Or we could rent a room at the Metro Court. The only thing is we don't have a lot of money," Johnny said.

"I know you don't like accepting help from other people, but my family will help us with whatever we need," she said.

"You're right, I don't, but I would because I can't take care of you and the baby by myself right now. I just don't think they would be willing to help you because you're taking me back," Johnny explained.

"Maybe they won't be excited, but they will always be there for me. And this baby means a lot to everyone. Not just you and me although I get more excited every day," Lulu said.

"You know them better than I do. So where do you want to stay?" he asked.

"I love this place, but I want to keep it for getaways only. We can stay at the Metro Court until we find a place," she answered.

"Okay. I guess we should head back then. It's pretty late in the morning and I want to let Claudia know that I'm coming home. She'll love you forever now," Johnny said with a laugh.

"We have gotten along better. Maybe this is a turning point," Lulu smirked.

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Johnny and Lulu walked hand-in-hand into Wyndamere laughing and talking. Nikolas was wide-eyed and obviously shocked. They were unaware of his presence because they were completely wrapped up in each other. Nikolas cleared his throat as their short kisses began to linger.

"Oh, I thought you were upstairs, Nikolas," Lulu said. "I came to get my things and to tell you I was back in town and Johnny was with me."

"I guess that is a good thing?" Nikolas asked.

"A very good thing," Lulu answered while smiling at Johnny and squeezing his hand gently.

"Lulu, why don't get your things while I talk to John," Nikolas suggested.

Johnny nodded assuringly and Lulu went to retrieve her stuff. Nikolas and Johnny stood in silence. Nikolas glaring at Johnny and Johnny calmly staring back at Nikolas. Finally, Nikolas spoke.

"You hurt my sister. I promised you if you hurt her, I would hurt you back. Since you ran out of town right after, I didn't get the chance, but now I have it. Give me one reason not to punch you out right now," Nikolas said.

"I don't have one. I don't have a reason why Lulu took me back. All I can say is that with all of the mistakes I made, I never loved Lulu any less. I will always love her and if I hurt her again, I hope you'll kill me. It would be easier on me," Johnny replied.

"She loves you. Unconditionally. That's why she took you back. And if you hurt her now, I will have to let you live. For the baby that you two are going to have. Do you really think you can be a dad? All of your father figures considered?" Nikolas asked.

"From what Lulu has told me about your family and then you're relationship with Spencer, I think I can pull it off. As long as I have Lulu, I can do anything," Johnny said with confidence.

"Well you have me forever, but what is it you are trying to do exactly?" Lulu asked coming back into the room.

"We were just discussing John's impending fatherhood," Nikolas answered.

"What about it?" Lulu asked cautiously.

"How I think he'll do just fine," Nikolas said looking at Johnny.

Lulu grinned and Nikolas and Johnny shook hands. They said goodbye and Lulu took her things to the car. The next stop was the Metro Court to check in and meet Claudia and Sonny for dinner. The dinner began awkwardly as Sonny and Johnny stared at the table while Claudia and Lulu tried to make small talk. Eventually, Lulu broke the tension by grabbing Johnny's hand and forcing his gaze to her.

"Johnny, say what you want to say to Sonny. Stop shutting off because this dinner is uncomfortable," Lulu said in a whisper.

Johnny closed his eyes and looked over to Sonny and Claudia who seemed to be having a similar conversation. He nodded and took a deep breath.

"Sonny, I need to apologize to you. There has been a lot of bad blood between us since we've known each other and I want to put a stop to that now. This life and myself cost you Michael. I don't want that to happen to my child. I don't expect forgiveness, but I'm hoping for peace for the sake of both of our families," Johnny finished.

Lulu and Claudia looked nervously between Sonny and Johnny as they stared at each other for what seemed like an eternity. Claudia looked at Sonny begging him with her eyes to accept Johnny's offer. She did not want to be caught between the brother she loved and the husband she was falling for.

"I agree," Sonny said after awhile. "I would never want what happened to Michael to happen to anyone. Especially not Lulu's child. You three deserve a chance to be happy."

"Thank you, Sonny," Lulu said placing a hand over her stomach.

"Thank you," Johnny agreed.

"Well I think we need an excellent dessert to celebrate," Claudia said.

"I think Lulu's ready for bed. It's been a long day," Johnny said looking at Lulu.

"I am. I hope we can do this again some time," Lulu said with a smile.

Johnny and Lulu headed for their suite and were about to get in bed when Lulu realized she hadn't called Spinelli. She dialed the number and pushed the button for speaker phone, so Johnny could hear and talk, too.

"'Tis I, the Jackal," Spinelli answered.

"Hey Spinelli, it's Lulu," she said, smiling at Johnny who was rubbing her back suggestively.

"Fair One? The mother of the Miniature Fair One sounds pleasant. May the Jackal assume that the Mob Prince and the Blonde One have reconciled?"

"Yes, Spinelli. Lulu and I are here together," Johnny answered.

Johnny and Lulu heard a lot of noise and were growing concerned after awhile when Spinelli hadn't said anything.

"Spinelli? Are you okay?" Lulu asked.

"Yes, Fair Lulu. The Jackal is overjoyed. He was just doing his happy dance for the reunion of the Two Bounded Souls and apparently was not as apt on his feet as necessary," Spinelli said and Johnny laughed at the mental picture of Spinelli's happy dance.

"Are you okay?" Lulu said concerned.

"Beyond elation. Perhaps the Jackal will see the New Familial Unit tomorrow for breakfast nourishment?" Spinelli asked.

"That sounds great Spinelli. How about Kelly's?" Lulu asked laughing again as Johnny began kissing her neck.

"Agreed. I bid you goodnight Fair Lulu and Mob Prince," Spinelli said.

"Goodnight," Johnny and Lulu said in unison.

Lulu hung up the phone and Johnny immediately pulled her close and began trailing kisses along her neck and jaw.

"I thought I was tired," Lulu said laughing.

"I decided you weren't tired enough," Johnny said against her lips before kissing her. He pulled back slightly, "Plus when Claudia brought up dessert, I got some ideas."

Lulu laughed and their lips touched softly again. She couldn't believe she was this happy. After everything that she and Johnny had been through, they survived. All of the love stories she had seen in her life became lack luster to her in this moment.

Lulu and Johnny were the real love story for the record books.


	12. Epilogue

**Epilogue – No End In Sight**

Lulu stood in her new home washing her cereal bowl and the other left over dishes from last night. She couldn't believe the events of the last few months. She had been through the most painful thing she had ever experienced and now was happier than she had ever been. Johnny may have broken her heart, but he made up for it with the little things he now did everyday.

The way he never missed a doctor's appointment or brought her fresh flowers just to make her day better. Honestly, things were not the way they used to be. They were better. They were more in love than ever and excited to be parents. She smiled as she felt arms wrap around her waist and two hands holding her ever-growing stomach. She was only barely showing, but felt fat. Johnny said she was beautiful and by the way he said it, she chose to believe him. She laughed as she felt his lips come to her neck.

"Good morning to you too, Johnny," Lulu said.

"Mmm, good morning beautiful," Johnny replied placing a kiss on her shoulder.

"You have a one track mind Johnny Zacchara," Lulu said as he began nibbling the back of her neck.

"It's not my fault you dress so damn appealing all of the time," Johnny said.

Lulu laughed and turned in his arms. She was wearing his pajama pants and a tank top that was stretched tight over her stomach. Her hair was in a messy pile on top of her head because she hadn't taken the time to fix it when she got out of bed. She was anything _**but**_ appealing.

"Quite the charmer aren't you," Lulu said. "Unfortunately, you have to go take a shower and get ready and so do I which leaves no time for this today. I want to get to the hospital early and try to get in sooner than what my appointment is. I'm so excited to find out if we're having a boy or a girl."

Johnny smiled and kissed her quickly on the lips before placing his hands around her waist. He quickly picked her up and set her on the kitchen counter earning a disapproving look from Lulu who was annoyed with his persistence. He smirked at her and then his face softened as he placed his hands on her stomach and began talking animatedly.

"Hey baby. I am so excited to see you today," Johnny started. "I'm so excited for the day you leave mommy's tummy and I get to hold you in my arms. I'm going to protect you from everything and teach you anything you want to know. Mommy and I love you so much, precious baby," he finished pressing a kiss to Lulu's stomach.

He looked up to see tears rolling down Lulu's cheeks. He gently lifted her off of the counter and placed a kiss on both cheeks where the tears were and then one on her forehead before finally placing a chaste kiss on her lips.

"This kid's pretty lucky to have a great dad like you," Lulu said smiling.

"And a mom like you, he said as he caressed her face. "I'm going to take a shower."

As he turned to walk out of the room Lulu couldn't help but smile. She followed him to their bedroom and heard him turn on the shower. She waited until he got in and then undressed and joined him. He laughed when she entered.

"I thought there wasn't time for this," Johnny said.

"I thought showering together would save time," Lulu said with a seductive smile.

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Johnny and Lulu waited nervously for the doctor to come in for the ultrasound. Johnny was never happier than in this moment. Although Lulu had asked him countless times with Johnny saying it didn't matter, he was hoping to find out today they had a baby girl on the way. Johnny laughed every time Spinelli called the baby 'The Miniature Fair One' because that's exactly what he wanted. A daughter just as beautiful as her mother that he could love and protect and spoil rotten.

The doctor came in and explained what would take place during the ultrasound. Johnny felt Lulu squeeze his hand as the doctor rubbed the gel on her stomach. Johnny held his breath as the doctor checked the baby to make sure everything was going well. It was and Johnny let out a sigh of relief. Then he became nervous again.

"I understand you want to know the sex of the baby," the doctor commented.

"Yes," Lulu nodded.

"Okay, well let's take a look," the doctor replied. After a few minutes of adjusting the machine, the doctor smiled and said, "There it is. Congratulations, you are going to be the proud parents of a beautiful little girl."

Johnny was speechless. He stared in awe at his baby girl. He tightened his grip on Lulu's hand and stole a glance at her. She was entranced in the screen and he pressed a light kiss to her hair.

"I'll print a picture for you and come back," the doctor said excusing herself.

"She's perfect," Lulu said with tears of joy spilling from her eyes.

"Just like her mom," Johnny agreed. "Thank you so much, Lulu. You have given me the most amazing gift."

"What?" Lulu asked confused and Johnny chuckled.

"Do you want a list? You, your love, your faith, this baby girl," he said taking a glance at the monitor. "I am forever in your debt for these things and also the little things you give me each day."

"I will always be yours. And in case you didn't know, you will always be mine because I'm not letting you go," Lulu laughed. "So, you got the girl you wanted."

Johnny smiled. "How did you know I wanted a girl?" he asked.

"I just know you. I knew you would want a daddy's little girl," Lulu explained.

"Well yes. I'm so happy. A healthy, beautiful baby girl. I love you," Johnny said.

"I love you, too." Lulu replied.

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Lulu had no idea why Johnny was making such a big fuss. It was a special day. Finding out that they were having a girl and that she was healthy had made the day perfect for Lulu, but Johnny insisted that he needed to take his two favorite girls out tonight. So she had gotten all dressed up and was riding in the car with a blindfold on while Johnny drove to their destination.

She reached for his hand and squeezed when she felt his touch.

"Why won't you tell me where we're going?" Lulu asked impatiently.

"And here I thought you were being sentimental by holding my hand. You were just trying to break my guard down so you could ruin your own surprise," Johnny said laughing.

Lulu laughed too as he brought her hand to his lips and kissed it tenderly. She knew he wouldn't tell her and part of her was glad. His surprises were always fun, but more for him than for her. She knew he enjoyed planning things for her and watching her squirm impatiently until she found out what was going on.

"Are we there yet?" Lulu groaned.

"Yes, but we're driving past it because you're complaining," Johnny said sarcastically.

Lulu rolled her eyes behind the blindfold and snatched her hand away. He was frustrating her to no end. How much trouble would it be to give a small hint as to what was happening? She felt him grab her hand again and when she resisted, she could feel him smirking at her.

"Don't give me that look, Johnny. I want to know where we're going," Lulu demanded.

"Have I ever told you that I love you?" Johnny asked and she nodded. "Good, so you know that I'm doing this for you. I would do anything for you, so if you really want me to tell you and ruin the surprise and everything I planned, I will. But be sure that's what you want."

He was using some kind of psychology on her. She knew it, but it still worked.

"Fine. But are we at least close?" she asked defeated.

The car slowed and she felt them turn. "Very," he answered.

The car stopped and he led her up a few steps and then helped her sit in a chair at a table. He finally stepped behind her and undid the blindfold. Her surroundings amazed her. They appeared to be in the middle of nowhere, but Johnny had decorated the entire area. They were at a table for two and there were lights everywhere. Lulu could have only described it as a scene from a romantic movie, but it was better because it was all for her.

"So pleasantly surprised?" he asked watching her.

Lulu could only nod and smile happily. They ate their entire meal in silence because she couldn't find the words to thank him for this perfect dinner he had given her. He had made this day so special for her and she was so grateful. She started to speak when she saw him get up and come to her. There had been soft music playing and she assumed he was going to ask her to dance. She turned in her chair and her mouth fell open as he bent in front of her on one knee.

"Lulu, you amaze me. I haven't said a word this entire dinner because I've been watching you. How beautiful and graceful you are. I get lost in your eyes and don't know how to find my way out and I don't want to. I want to look into your eyes every day for the rest of my life. I want to tell you and show you how much I love you forever," Johnny paused and took a deep breath.

He took her left hand in his and Lulu was speechless. This was the last thing she expected. Was he doing what she thought he was doing?

"Lesley Lu Spencer, would you make me the luckiest man in the world by becoming my wife?"

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Lulu was just staring at him. Johnny had arranged the best dinner he could possibly have thought of and spent hours practicing his proposal. Not that it worked out because as soon as he got down on one knee, all his words left him so he just spoke from his heart. Apparently, he had gone wrong. Lulu was sitting there with her mouth open and not saying a word.

Johnny thought back a few days to Luke's words. Maybe Luke knew more about Lulu than Johnny realized.

"_Hey Luke, I need to talk to you," Johnny said as he walked into the Haunted Star._

"_What's on your mind? Are my cupcake's hormones finally wearing you down?" Luke asked._

"_No, actually it's kind of the opposite. This may be old fashioned, but there's something I need to ask you," Johnny said revealing a diamond engagement ring._

"_The answer is no. Lulu would kill me if I ran away to marry you. And just so you know, that's not old fashioned," Luke said laughing as Johnny rolled his eyes._

"_I want to ask Lulu to marry me and I want your blessing," Johnny said seriously._

"_You didn't ask my blessing for getting her pregnant," Luke laughed and then got serious. "Why now? Are you sure that Lesley Lu is ready to get married_?"

"_What do you mean? We love each other and we're having a baby. Why wouldn't we get married?" Johnny asked confused._

"_Marriage scares my daughter. She has a lot of role models for love, but not for happy marriages. She's probably content with the way things are," Luke explained._

"_I know that it used to, but things are different now. I want to make her mine forever, and I would love it if you supported us," Johnny said._

"_Not that it matters what I think to my daughter, I do support you. You have certainly made your share of mistakes, but I think you bring out the best in Lulu. I know she brings out the best in you and I understand why you want to hang onto that," Luke said. "You have my blessing."_

"_Thank you," Johnny said before leaving._

Now Johnny knew for sure. Luke was right. Lulu had been staring at him for at least five minutes and hadn't said a word. Her answer was obviously no, but Johnny didn't know how to get up. What was the next step in having your proposal rejected? There wasn't one. The girl always says yes and is completely excited.

"I don't know what to do, Lulu," Johnny said searching her eyes. "I guess I should swallow my pride, get off my knees and ask you to dance like this never happened."

Still nothing from Lulu.

"I can't do that, Lu. I want you to say yes and I need to know you will spend the rest of your life with me. I'm not going to swallow my pride or get up. We're not going to dance until you say yes or at least say something. Marry me? I'll ask you as many times as it takes to get a yes. Marry me, Lulu," Johnny begged.

Lulu seemed to finally snap out of her daze. Her eyes met his and Johnny could see her answer. She smiled and nodded as the tears streamed from her eyes. Johnny leaned in and kissed her softly, but she pulled back quickly.

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!" Lulu exclaimed. "I want to marry you and be with you forever. Yes, yes, yes!"

Lulu kissed him this time and it was his turn to pull back quickly. He reached in his pocket and pulled out the engagement ring. He placed it on her finger and she smiled even wider, though he didn't think it was possible.

They kissed again and this time neither pulled back. Lulu deepened the kiss and Johnny stood pulling her into his arms and spun her around, all the while their lips never broke. After kissing for several minutes, they pulled away out of breath and deliriously happy.

"What took you so long to answer?" Johnny asked.

"What took you so long to ask?" Lulu replied and Johnny laughed. "I thought I was dreaming. You asking me to marry you seemed like a fantasy to me and I couldn't believe it was real. After several minutes of convincing myself that this was really happening, I heard you saying that you thought I was saying no and I had to speak."

"I was so scared," Johnny admitted. "I didn't know what to do if you didn't want to marry me."

"I do want to marry you, Johnny. I want to show the world that I belong to you forever," Lulu said smiling.

"I belong to you, Lulu. Forever," Johnny agreed.

He asked her to dance and they swayed softly around the small area. Johnny held Lulu's waist tight and Lulu rested her head over his heart, listening to the intoxicating rhythm it created.

Johnny was so happy. He was having a baby girl and the girl of his dreams was going to marry him. They were going to be a real family. Before he met Lulu he didn't even bother to dream about a life like the one he was getting. He thought it was pointless to want something he would never have. But now he was going to be happy. He was going to be everything he never thought he could be and it was all because of the woman in his arms.

"I love you," Johnny whispered.

"I love you, too," Lulu whispered back.

**THE END**

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Thank you for reading my story! I loved writing it and appreciated all the comments I received!


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